Exclusive: the Pat & Rachel tapes

So I said to my English teacher colleague, Rachel, "Put on your blouse".

Surprised, she replied "I can put on my blouse. I can put my blouse on. I can put it on."

"Put it on," I repeated. Just to make sure.

For years to come at Chengdu Foreign Languages School, students will be torn between (or totally confused by) a Great Yarmouth 'Ba-r-th' and a Leeds 'B-a-th', a southern 'Gl-arse' and a northern 'Gl-ass', now that Rachel and I have spent four weeks laboriously recording 120 lessons' worth of repetition dialogues for them.

"Can we stop now?" "Yes, we can. We can stop now. Yes, now we can stop. Yes, now it's time to stop."